#MeToo – Gone too far.

In this post I am replying to an article I saw published on Elephant Journal entitled: “Dear Men: if you answer YES to any of these questions, you may be the reason someone else says, Me, Too.”

I am not anti-feminist, in fact I am a strong supporter of women’s rights but too much is too much. Although I enjoyed reading the above mentioned article and found a lot of truth in it, I would like to point out where, in my opinion, this #MeToo movement is taking things too far.

Here’s my take on the author’s questions; both from personal experience, i.e., similar or same experiences that have happened to me, and from my point of view:

Below, the questions raised in the article and my answers to them:

” Have you ever touched a person without his/her express consent?”

Well, I’ve been touched many times without my consent but no big deal, usually a firm WTF ends the unwanted attention.

“Have you ever asked a woman why she wasn’t smiling or told her she’d look better if she smiled?”

OK, this happens a lot and I admit that it is extremely annoying — especially if one’s cat has just died — for it portraits the nasty stereotype that women should just smile and open their legs, no matter what. So Kudos Here to the author!
“Have you ever sent an unsolicited message commenting on a stranger’s looks?”

Very annoying but easily dismissed.
“Have you ever catcalled another person?”

Hello! I grew up in Italy. is this a joke? Daily, of course. It’s harmless and might even make one smile as she/he walks away.
“Have you ever made an inappropriate sexual joke?”

Better an inappropriate sexual joke than a racist, anti-Semitic one. Just don’t laugh — lest you find it funny — and look at the person with a long, blank stare instead.
“Have you ever shown your genitals to someone without their express request? This could be in person or by message. (If you’ve ever sent an unsolicited d*ck pic, this is you.)”

I was seventeen, it was late evening in Winter, I was walking down a very dark, narrow street in London when, pushed against a brick wall, really close to me, a guy opened his raincoat and flashed me. Bit of a shock but I walked on unharmed. Much worse that time in Italy when the same thing happened — albeit in broad day light — and the guy proceeded to show me what looked like — to my very quick glance — a cut-off penis on a piece of cardboard. Walked away more quickly than in the instance above and remained — to this day — rather puzzled but again nothing to keep me up at night.
“Have you ever flirted with or made sexual advances to a person who could be considered subordinate to you in a professional situation?”

Oh, please, of course they have. Most of them if they had a chance. Perhaps to the secretary with the fake boobs, the short skirt, high heels and fake lips? Plain Jane, I assume, was spared the un-wanted attention and the huge amount of work that it took to keep them at bay while keeping the job. I am not contradicting myself here. Let’s not forget that just as (most) women have an instinctive protective nature, (most) men have an instinctive urge to spread their semen to populate the World. Some things are just in the genes and it takes a very evolved person to correct that in themselves.
“Have you ever laughed at jokes about rape or assault?”

I guess things like Trump saying, “they want to be pussy-grabbed.” Bad taste is bad taste. Without action on intent it isn’t illegal.
“Have you ever put your hands on a man/woman without their permission while dancing in a club or bar?”

For real?! Does the author live in a Mormon community?!?!
“Have you ever had sex with a person who was inebriated and, therefore, incapable of providing consent?”

Well, if you have, that’s RAPE. (Finally a decent — no pun intended — question).
“Have you ever continued to touch someone who said no?”

Of course they have, sometimes it takes a bit more effort to push them away but, as long as the final result IS to push them away, again, not much harm done. Life’s a bitch; assertiveness is a daily constant, not just physically but — even more difficult to realize — emotionally too.
“Have you ever made repeated sexual advances to someone who has said no?”

Well then you are a resilient son of a bitch who, I hope, got punched in the nose and now feels like a total idiot – that you are – yet, if your “repeated” sexual advances were successfully aborted, there’s no legal case there either.
Why am I, a woman and a feminist writing this? Because I have had most of the experiences described above — and much, much worse — through the course of my life thus, I can make the difference between sexual harassment and idiocy.

Also, I am no celebrity looking for publicity (thank god), and I’m smart enough to acknowledge that if I walk around scantily dressed and acting provocatively I might be sending out “wrong” signals.
A final example. In my late teens, at a casting, the guy took me to his office and asked me to perform a fellatio on him. I told him he was disgusting, walked away an enrolled in university. Personal choices…
Let’s cut the average bloke some slack and concentrate on real sexual offenders, of which there are many, in varied, disgusting forms. Shall we?

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A letter of Condolences

My dear friend,
Thank you for your letter and my most sincere condolences for the loss of your friend.
All you say is very true and well, indeed.
As someone who’s tried it twice in the last year – and God only knows how the Hell I am still alive – well, what I wanted to say is that sometimes it’s just too much; and yes, someone could have tried harder; how could I do this to those who love me and I have responsibilities towards and all the rest but, in the end, it makes no difference because the truth is that, sometimes – please note that this is a daily struggle, often a few times a day too; a struggle with a life we don’t want to keep on living and the survival instinct that makes us say: “Maybe, tomorrow.” – it’s just too much and all we long for is the peace we know and remember being our true selves. And then it happens: an enormous calm enters one’s body and mind and without further ado one commits the act. No thoughts whatsoever, just an automatic response in an almost dream-like state.
I’m not going to add how the decision then happens for I don’t want to put ideas in anyone’s mind. I stop here.

Blessings to you all and to the ones you have lost.

 

Compulsive Positive Thinking (CPT) The New Creed

WOH…Don’t you throw your negative energy at me!

l’m neither a psychologist nor a psychiatric (who must be immune to it or else are not superficial and selfish arseholes).

l’ll only talk bullshit as, you see, l’ve been brain-washed by Compulsive Positive Thinking (CPT), which–by the way– goes a long way to keep lay people in their places to the benefit of those in power.

In fact, in this Fear-Based Society, be scared, be very scared of the smallest negative thought for its consequences will be but certain catastrophe.

I can vouch for this by the multitude of people who are living horrible lives thanks to my negative opinions of them. If only…

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for mindfulness but all within limits.

Imagine, if you will, someone like Mother Theresa telling the leprechauns she dedicated her life work to, to stop whining; to stop suffering; that their negative thinking had caused their illnesses.different peopleYeah, maybe, perhaps…who knows for sure.

Do you?

But the real question is: Where is your heart? your compassion? your empathy?

Countless other examples could be made which would mean nothing unless one was walking in the other person’s shoes in this dualist world we ALL live in.

Self Love & Acceptance ~ Awakening to Yourself

Brilliant and inspiring piece, everyone should read, by the lovely Ms Lisa Colburn 🙂

Conscious Healings ~ Metaphysical Blog Providing Intuitive Spiritual Guidance

There has been a common theme lately with folks that I have been encountering, either in my personal life or with my healing work. After taking a few weeks off article writing, unsure of where to go next with things, this topic jumped out to me and I knew right away it was something that needed to be discussed. As an intuitive and empath, I can feel the energy of the collective, which is very different than an individual energy. Many people can feel this energy and are tuned in, but do not realize it is far greater than just their own feelings. It is far more powerful and the vibration feels like it literally extends through the entire earth and into our core, connecting is to all souls and the Universe. This often happens when many people begin to feel similarly, at the same time or are dealing with…

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Memory, Mood and Focus Super-Herb: Bacopa | John Douillard’s LifeSpa

This super-herb is called Bacopa monnieri.

It is understood to be the most potent and effective nerve and brain tonic in Ayurvedic medicine.

As you will see, by clicking on the link below, it has been traditionally used to treat mental health concerns, mood issues, and memory, focus, and cognition functions.

Memory, Mood and Focus Super-Herb: Bacopa | John Douillard’s LifeSpa.

Please note that Bacopa Monnieri is NOT the same as Gotu Kola, Brahmi or Centella Asiatica.

Read the ingredients carefully and, if possible, go organic.

Blessings,

Alecs

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Alcohol and Countries

In Turkey, mostly a Muslim country, they have restrained the time when one’s allowed to buy alcohol, regardless of the fact that 90% of people living there claim to have never had a drink in their lives.

In Toronto, Canada, I went to an Indian restaurant. I got in and the waitress asked me if I was thinking of having a drink with my meal. Dumbfounded, I asked why she wanted to know. She explained that I couldn’t sit in the Veranda if I was going to order a beer with my meal in order to avoid young people ~ passing by ~ seeing me having a good time and thinking they’d do the same once they’d be grown up.

If I wanted to have a beer with my Indian meal, I would have to sit where I was not facing the street.

In fact, in the whole city of Toronto, one can’t buy any sort of alcohol in supermarkets. One would have to go to a place on the outskirts of Toronto, marked XXX, where winos hang around; and one would need a car to get there.

I did manage to find a place near-by selling wine. I bought a bottle of San Giovese for $CAD 10,00.
The same bottle of wine costs me €1 at the local supermarket in Milan, Italy. You do the arithmetic.

Back to Milan, I went to the local supermarket and overheard fourteen-year-old kids talking on their mobiles to their school mates trying to decide what kind of booze to get for the end-of-school party: ” Okay then, a bottle of Vodka; some beer;  some Cranberry juice; Martini; Prosecco; Negroni and some Pineapple juice should do it, yeah?”

Go figure…

Why I No Longer Support Israel

Today I’m sharing a beautiful and informative article written by Mr Herb Silverman on the Huffington Post that I believe many will appreciate and enjoy reading…

Human-rights from the perspective and expertise of an American citizen of Jewish origin.

I couldn’t agree more with Mr. Silverman; in fact Israel has been on my Countries-Not-To-Visit list for a while (should anyone wonder, I’m neither Jewish nor Palestinian).

Shame Mr Netanyahu! You certainly do not deserve having been re-elected.

Please click on the link below to go to the original post:

Why I No Longer Support Israel

In awe of Italians ~ not really.

I am always very impressed with how highly some people seem to value themselves; I really am.

The other day I went to the London Pirelli’s headquarter to meet up with a successful business man I’ve known–literally–all my life, just to say hello as we were both in town and this is what one does…

I wasn’t impressed with the premises, by the way, and the receptionist–although lovely–looked like Morticia Addams while the guy at the door was simply scruffy.

Surely Italians are aware of their already iffy reputation and would pay more attention to first impressions? Apparently no.

Most likely–still living on Roman-times’ credit–they are oblivious to it.

Anyway, this gentleman tells me that he’s thinking of taking his sailing boat to the Caribbean where he can make lots of money just by chartering people around the islands for two months a year. ALL this guy needs is a woman who’s willing to cook and clean for the guests and, of course, look after him too.

Such ‘lucky’ woman will not be making any money as she will benefit enough from the amazing lifestyle as it is! In the meanwhile, this guy is planning to make around 90,000 pounds PER WEEK out of the enterprise and other people’s work, while getting laid.

I’m in awe ~ not.